This week is a huge episode for Evryman. Coming off the last retreat Dan sits down with his own father, Blayne Doty. They talk about Dan's expectations of having his dad come to a retreat, how Blayne has grown as a father, a grandfather, and a person and they talk about their early years as a family growing up in North Dakota as well. Blayne loves good hard rock, he's a master homemade pizza maker, and brews sparkling mead. He loves sharing his pizza and mead with people around him. You could be one of those lucky ones to try his specialty if you come to the Yellowstone Expedition. Blayne will be cooking during the expedition! Evryman's next outdoor adventure, the Yellowstone Expedition, is coming up in a month! Sign up for this amazing experience that takes place in June. One more thing, be on the look out for a TEDx Talk Dan gave in Bozeman this last weekend in April. When the video is up we will be sharing it on all platforms. Be sure to subscribe to the Evryman Podcast to stay up to date on our weekly episode. You can find us on most podcast listening sites such as Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Spotify, iHeartRadio, and more.
This week is a huge episode for Evryman. Coming off the last retreat Dan sits down with his own father, Blayne Doty. They talk about Dan's expectations of having his dad come to a retreat, how Blayne has grown as a father, a grandfather, and a person and they talk about their early years as a family growing up in North Dakota as well.
Blayne loves good hard rock, he's a master homemade pizza maker, and brews sparkling mead. He loves sharing his pizza and mead with people around him. You could be one of those lucky ones to try his specialty if you come to the Yellowstone Expedition. Blayne will be cooking during the expedition!
Evryman's next outdoor adventure, the Yellowstone Expedition, is coming up in a month! Sign up for this amazing experience that takes place in June.
One more thing, be on the look out for a TEDx Talk Dan gave in Bozeman this last weekend in April. When the video is up we will be sharing it on all platforms.
Be sure to subscribe to the Evryman Podcast to stay up to date on our weekly episode. You can find us on most podcast listening sites such as Apple Podcasts, Google Play, Spotify, iHeartRadio, and more.
Dan Doty:<= span style=3D'mso-tab-count:1'> = 00:03 You are listening to = EVRYMAN podcast. This is episode 49 my name is Dan Dotyand our guest today is my dad, Blayne Dot= y. I'm recording this intro from an open air place i= n southern Florida. It's early morning and the birds are making some noise. Ma= ybe can hear that. I want to talk first about our next upcoming adventure. At th= e end of June, we're doing our Yellowstone wilderness expedition, which is goi= ng to be a handful of men who come together to go out in nature in one of the m= ost special places that we have. I would actually say on this planet one of the most protected places and cherished places that we have on this planet in te= rms of wild nature, amazing geography, and we're taking an inner and an outer adventure while we hike up and over the Galton mountain range and climb peak= s and do all this incredible stuff.
Dan: = 00:55 We're going to be goi= ng on an adventure inside of us as well, and that combination is about the most exciting thing I can think of in the entire world. I can't wait to be out there. Myself and Aaron= Blaine are leading it. Aaron is a senior member of every man and has been helping organ= ize and run our community and our retreats since pretty much the beginning. We would love to see you there with us and we have a handful of spots left so i= f you're curious, go on our website every man.co and you can click on the even= ts, click on the Yellowstone expedition. If you have any questions, there's link= s. Just shoot us a note and let's talk about it. All right. My intro is going t= o be short and sweet today. The episode itself is going to speak for everythin= g that ever needs to be said about this entire endeavor.
Dan: = 01:41 For me, about a month= ago, a little less than a month ago now, my dad came on the last open source retreat and this one wa= s in the Berkshire's and the East Coast and basically everything has changed since then and I mean that not dramatically but completely with full honesty that our relationship has changed. I feel like our family has changed fundamentally. My Dad is a really incredible guy and I've always known that = my whole life. And I've always felt him holding back some of that incrediblenes= s, you know, or, or honestly, not, not the incredibleness so much, but just, ju= st his love, you know, he's, he's got a huge heart and I think I always knew th= at. And now I'm now it's just all out there. Um, I don't even really know what t= o say to introduce this podcast. It's, it's, it's all gonna be there. I'm gonn= a let the show do the talking this week and I'll just end this by saying I tru= ly, truly hope that as many men as possible on this planet can get to have an experience with their dad, of their dad, of their family. That means as much= as this has to me and I know means the world to him too. And, uh, I'll just let you get at it. Thank you.
Blayne Doty: = 03:08 Yeah.
Dan: = 03:15 Alright. I'm here wit= h my dad, my dad, Blayne. Do yo= u want me to say your whole name?
Blayne: = Hey Dan, tell me. Sure. Go ahead and playing Sherman D= oty. That's me for grandfather. Did Duke father to me and Jake husband to penny father-in-law to Elise father-in-law to Elise grandpa to another one on the = way yet to be named. Probably not chairman and isn't really more, um, I'm tired. I'm tired. It's been a big weekend. Um, dad's in town. Mom and dad are in to= wn. Yesterday was the Ted x Bozeman event where I give a very emotional talk and awesome. Yeah. Awesome talk is, it was a highlight of the day and us not jus= t dad and darken. How would you, well, I'm pretty excited about this. We, uh, man, how long has it been now? Since a, so you came on our last retreat. How long? Three weeks. That's it. It was the 13th. And it's what, 30th or 29th? Yeah. So, yeah, three weeks. Ballpark. Um, now lots happened.
Blayne: = No. Yeah, my life has changed. Other than that, everything's about the same.I really don't know w= here to start. I really, I really don't. Uh, I mean, Geez, we could start anywher= e. Yeah. I'm probably the least interesting guest you've ever had. <= /span>
Dan: = = = I think you're wrong actually. I actually think you're= very wrong. I mean, I guess what I'll, I guess just to dive right in. So, um, I dunno, I had, I think I had been hoping and wishing and plotting for many ye= ars to, to do a weekend or some sort of event like we did together. And uh, you most certainly not the least interesting guests because, uh, I mean, if, if = the way that you impacted people at that retreat is an, is a measure than your, maybe the most interesting guest we've ever had. And I would say, well, they haven't hired me for the, that one beer commercial yet. I'm waiting for the phone call. I don't know if you've ever get that one. You might get bug spra= y. [inaudible]
Speaker 1: = 05:52 I don't know if you'l= l get that one. Maybe. Yeah, maybe the second most interesting. Okay. Do you want to tell everybody about the, your new clothes? Oh, yes, I do. Okay. It all stems from that weekend. Three weeks ago, you know, I flying to New York LaGuardia, minding = my own business, and I get picked up by Dan and Aaron and we wind up in a what? Eastern Massachusetts? Western Massachusetts up in the mountains and from th= at day on my life has changed in, you know, the weekend was so, um, impactful o= n me and ever since I left there, I've, I've been evolving, evolving and evolving. But yesterday I went to target all by myself shopping and I came home. The new me you did, I came home with, oh wow. They're almost pink, ski= nny jeans.
Speaker 1: = 07:03 Um, and really it's, = it was a dream me and I got the A and I don't know what you'd call the shoes. Just yeah, like sneake= rs, sneakers with the white rim and you know, look like a, yeah. You know, Ahmad guy of course. Mod. Do you, you guys don't use that word anymore? Nope. Not = a cool shirt. Yeah. And I tell you what, I felt, I felt different. I felt good= . I had to do something special for downs. I'd be, it works man. Like I mean, El= ise said, dad, like completely shifted her day yesterday to come downstairs and they see you come downstairs and it's true, man. Like it really is. It's lik= e you, well, you know, I've known you for as long as I've known anybody. And u= h, um, yeah, I like, there's these moments in my life and I think as you've got older, I think I've seen them more often, but where it's just like the, the = not holding back you shines through.
Speaker 1: = 08:08 But yesterday those c= lothes like really hit it out. I stepped over the line a little bit yesterday and that was good. Yeah,= it felt good. Yeah. Yeah. Well man, there's so many things I want to say, or I guess I want to brag about you a little bit first that, you know, it's not a totally new, you not totally, you know, you have, you're a poet, you're a builder, you're a brewer, you're a chef. You're like, you have all this incredible like creative outlet and you're like, you know, I don't know whet= her you felt it, uh, you know, fully confident, not like, you know, you've have = all this creative energy that runs through you and it comes out. And I think now= it just feels like it's like, I dunno, closer to the surface are not tamped dow= n or I dunno. It's amazing. Well that's awesome to hear. I tell Ya. Um, you're right. You know, after I took early retirement in 2009, that kind of just allowed me to try different things. So I started writing poetry. Yeah. And then we got into a situation where I had a shop an= d I had a drill and a saw on, had some logs to work with and I built things and it's just been fun. And I got into brewing sparkling meet Dan.
Speaker 3: = 09:43 Okay.
Speaker 1: = 09:44 I haven't had the pre= ssure. My wife who so graciously has
Speaker 3: = 09:49 okay
Speaker 1: = 09:50 kept her career. So we have an income steady income and we've got benefits and all that. That's allowed me to be a little more creative. And I'm doing, um, consulting. I me= an, I've spent time in, in China for over three years. I've spent, um, made four trips to Russia in the last nine months doing consulting work. So maybe the dose IQ thing is possible. Maybe we're not that far off, but, but we, I thin= k it's a little different. It's not quite the, it's not, it's gotta be a different vibe. Right. It's not the bearded like sex bomb at the bar. Maybe = it could be, but there's a little funkier. It's to be, is this the more Minneso= ta short little fat guy with the little white puffed on his chin, Kinda walked into the bar and starts reciting poetry. We're not pants me wearing pink pan= ts and telling people how bad their pizzas. Oh yeah. Yeah. Sometimes I should k= eep my mouth shut.
Speaker 1: = 10:59 Well, you know, it's,= it's pretty cool to be sitting here with you now because things are, I don't know, things are a lot= . They're different between us too. Oh, absolutely. They're easier. Oh yeah. W= e can. It feels like we can just hang out. You know, it feels like, to me it feels like it's been this way for, for last such a long time, but it hasn't been right. You know, my whole life, you know, like I said, my life changed after that weekend. I can still remember, but I'm trying to, um, block out t= he bad things from before him before. Oh yeah. Yeah. Because this is so much better. Yeah. So much more powerful. So yeah.
Speaker 3: = 11:45 Wow.
Speaker 1: = 11:45 Much better for every= body else around me. So, yeah. So what does that mean? Can you explain wha= t that means or why? No, I'll just, I'll be honest, like I was on that weekend= . Um, you know what, before I get into that, and I'll say one thing, when I wa= s sitting in that, in that group of 50 men out east, um, I realized I wasn't alone. I mean, I wasn't the only one that had things buried. Yeah. It was, i= t was holding me back. The only thing that helped me back in my life was me. A= nd it was so obvious, you know, sitting there that I was not the only one. So, = you know what the weekend did, it allowed me, it gave me a place to feel safe so= I could open up and dig deep and, you know, work on that stuff. And, and, and what I needed work on the most was, uh, not feeling so afraid because my who= le life from like when I was offered the last 40, 50 years, I've kept most of t= he people closest to me at arms length.
Speaker 1: = 13:10 Um, I could let a str= anger feel like they were, they were coming in and I accepting and I was, you know, I've got a bi= g heart and I care and all that, but I had been hurting so much, you know, it = got to the point I wasn't going to let anybody hurt me again. And what happened was, um, my wife took the brunt of it and then my sons because how can, how = can a boy grow up watching his mom and dad not hug and kiss and hold hands and a= ll that. And that was my whole life. That's how I grew up. Um, I thought that w= as normal, but I took it to the next level. I think I took it in a little too f= ar. And at one point, you know, 15 years ago or, you know, I forget when it was,= I told myself never again. I mean, I was more accepting up to that point, but then something happened and I told myself never again. S= o it just got worst really. That was the second moment where really, yeah. Yea= h. Get just a hair closer to the yup. Yup. Um, was that before or after you retired? Oh, before, before. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So it's, and so, but yeah, I mean, I don't know that I've ever, again, I'm bias= ed probably too, but I don't know that I've seen anybody, uh, take as
Speaker 1: = 14:52 seriously or as fully= what we do as you did that weekend. I mean, and it just blew the lid off. Yeah. I think I told you= , but two weeks prior to this weekend, you know, I knew I, I was going to have= to attend one of these weekend retreats. I needed to do it for you, but the clo= ser it got to that weekend and then even four to five days before I realized I w= as doing it for myself.
Speaker 1: = 15:24 Yeah. And that, that = was not going to hold back. Yeah. And you did. I didn't, I did not. No, no. I, I was going to take full advantage and I what an opportunity it was. Yeah. Yeah. Just and I thin= k, I mean, what do you think now too? I mean, I also think you did it for mom o= nly did it for absolutely. But yeah, he did it for your dad. Yeah. And like I wa= s telling you today with my dad, he and I didn't have never gotten along. Yeah= . You know, I'd walk into the room and you know, hair on my back of my neck an= d raise and you know, we just didn't have time for him because, you know, honestly, he wasn't a perfect father. Like I was, you know, I wasn't a perfe= ct father, but since then it's just amazing and I feel compassion for the man. I've put my hand on his shoulder. I'm not short with him at all. Um, yeah, I love him.
Speaker 3: = 16:38 Yeah.
Speaker 1: = 16:39 Oh, I hadn't said tha= t since the weekend. Wow. So, yeah, it was, it's Big Bang Bank. Yeah. Did you ever know or assume or guests that, that feeling that you talked about? Bristling that I had that around, you know, but you well, I could feel it. Yeah. I was hoping it wasn'= t true. But then your mom would share with me. Yeah. How you felt then? Oh, it made me feel so bad. Yeah. So I mean, I did this.= It was the best thing for me and I'll be selfish. Yeah. I've changed so much, b= ut I am
Speaker 3: = 17:25 okay.
Speaker 1: = 17:27 My wife looks at me d= ifferent, we act different together. You and I act different together. Yeah. It's like, it's just like, it's like there was a heavy curtain you could see through it and = you could hear through it, but it just got lifted or something. I mean, that's h= ow I feel with you. Something subdued. Well and to go back, so, so yeah, I did like I had this dual feeling for you. I mean, not always, but I think strong= er, different times. Both. Like, all I wanted was to hang out with you and have = you around and then, but yeah, it was just like this and it was what it felt lik= e inside of me was just like, like if somebody put a balloon in me and blew it= up all the way and they're just walking around just like, just like uncomfortab= le because it was just full of this tense thing inside of me and I didn't know what to do with it. And you know, I mean, I'm sure you remember, but remembe= r that time in California on vacation? Oh yeah. That was just horrible. Was th= at horrible how we, I mean, it was good right when it came over. We finally, ye= ah. Communicated and shared a little bit, but it was just,
Speaker 1: = 18:46 yeah, it was, yeah, i= t was, yeah, it was bad. Yeah. But it was important for me because it felt like I saw you for the fir= st time. Yeah. But you know, all along, just like when we shared in our special moment on the weekend, you know, we put a lot of, there was a heavy burden o= n you, even as a little kid. Yeah. You know, and you were still carrying the burden, then it took you two to do what happened in California. Yeah. I mean= it wasn't, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that was interesting cause I felt like it just opened up things for a second and then things went back, you know? And it wa= s so easy to revert. Totally. You go back to your comfort zone. Yeah. And then= I held everybody away. You know what I told people after that though, at least= I had that I'm like, if I die or my dad dies.
Speaker 1: = 19:40 Oh Wow. At least we h= ad that moment. Yeah. That's how I felt after that. Yeah. What, what were your expectations from t= he weekend? I mean, before none. I had no expectations for your, I was really surprised you went. Oh, I mean, I think, I hope for exactly what happened. I kind of figured it would, oh, that's what happens on these things. Yeah. You know, and I know you. Yeah. You know, I know how big your heart is. I know h= ow, how much is there, and I know how close to the surface at all was too. And I= , I, I didn't have expectations. I just, I, I'm going into it. I got, you know= , it's a,
Speaker 1: = 20:23 yeah, yeah. I guess n= ot to get too out there with this, but it was a, I think it was an even bigger thing than just you a= nd I like in terms of our family in the long run. Oh, in the big picture. Yeah. Generationally. Yeah. You know, like, and I, and I felt that going, and like that Friday before we started, uh, when we did our little, um, facilitator, pre-meeting, I kind of lost it then and got now overwhelmed. And so I knew something was coming, you know, I can kind of= tell when something is coming now. Um, but no, I don't know. You know, I was, I w= as kinda nervous, but mostly just kinda let go, you know, trusted it. I mean, I trust what we do. I trust our team, I trust what you know. And uh, and like = it came out on the weekend in some ways, you know, I think that in the big picture, it's not a surprise at this that you came, it's not surprised that = I, you know, help build this thing and that we're here right now.
Speaker 1: = 21:33 You know, I mean it's= , it's a, in some ways a very logical conclusion to your life and my life. I thank you for well bring= ing me in, cause I, if there's ever anybody that needed it, it was me. So, yeah. Well me too. Yeah. I mean, I mean that's, that's one of the things that I've been noticing too is that, uh, we're pretty alike. Hmm. Yeah. You know, we really are, we have a lot of similarities and you know, like I, I've been killing myself myself. What if I had done this 38 years ago or whenever? Yea= h. What person would I be? I would not be who I was three weeks ago. I wouldn't have been that person. Not even close. Right. You are who I would have been very similar. I'd have been more similar to what you've been then, what I di= d. So 30 years ago you would have been, I am 34 right?
Speaker 1: = 22:36 Yeah. Right. Yeah. Bu= t it's weird though. Cause then I wouldn't be me. What would I be? You know? And that's one thing that really hit, you know, you guys were honoring me for you, for creating you an= d I was the shitty father. Good God. Yeah. But you weren't though. I mean, you h= ad been my biggest champion my entire life. You asked her, thank you for that. You've chaired me on my, into everything. I mean, look back on a taekwondo, football college trap. All the crazy shit I've done. You supported me in eve= ry part of it. Yep. You know? Yeah. And I mean, yeah, shitty. But like you said= , what, until we can step outside of our world, what the hell do we know? Righ= t? Yeah. I mean like, yeah. Well there's a few things I wish I wish every fathe= r and son could experience what we did.
Speaker 1: = 23:49 I wish every brother = with brother could experience that. Yeah. I wish you all of your best friends would go and experience that. Most of them have. Yeah. Don't wait as long as I did. Yeah.= I mean, I'm not complaining. I finally did it and it's, you know, it's, I'm a better man and you've broken the mold done. You know what my dad was as a fa= ther and what I was as a father you, I mean that's gone now, so, but, and you've = put such a, an awesome team together. Yeah. Just incredible people. And what, wh= at really impressed me, one of the things that really impressed me was how many men your age group were there. Yeah. I was thinking back, you know, when I w= as your age and what did we have guys from 27 28 to 74 most of them were the 27= to 40 yeah, probably.
Speaker 1: = 24:56 Yeah. Back when I was= in that age, I don't think we'd have seen guys step up. Like your generation is really incredible= . You guys care. I mean, you're not so stuck in that, that old stereotype. Thi= s is the way you do it. And Yeah. You know, cro mag. No, man. And all this stu= ff and it's, it was very refreshing. Yeah. To see that. You know what I like to think about though, you know more of a philosophical angle on it though, but= I like to ask the question of the different generations is like what did the world need from men in your generation? What did the world need from grandpa= ? What did the world need from GRANDPA's Dad Lawrence? Right. It's different m= an. I mean it's like, it's a totally different world. Right? And yeah, I think that's, um, yeah, I mean, what did the world need from, what was the world asking of men when you were raising me when you were like, I don't know, 30 well, to be honest, US baby, baby boomers, and I've talked to a lot of peopl= e about this.
Speaker 1: = 26:09 We raised, I raised m= y kids in there. They raised their kids in a lot of cases and gave them everything they didn't get= as a kid. Your mom and I separate families, separate towns. You know, we grew u= p on hot dish and we didn't get, you know, anything special. We didn't have money. My folk. I did you want to put hot dish to? Of co= urse I got to be hot dish was [inaudible] well yeah I suppose it was invented in = the 50s oh I see. Okay. Anyway I you, oh no you're no= t dishes. Yeah. Well anybody listening, no one has issues. Explain it. Explain what I did cause this is a big deal. Well I have = to me hot dishes, you know you've got noodles and then you throw in a can of a either tomato soup or cream of mushroom soup and hamburger, tuna fish or you know, you make a combination to throw it in the oven and outcomes a hot dish. Yes. So you grew up= on it. Soda. Everybody needs to know soda at the end there was the immense, so = I don't know if you had this when you were a kid, but we had taco hot dish piz= za, hot dish too. And a hot dish tomato, hot dish. Hamburger, hot dish. Desert h= ot dish. I mean we had potato hot, like we had 40 hot dishes. Did you have that many growing up or did you have less? Well, no, we had lots of hot dishes. Something like care to forget a man. Okay.
Speaker 1: = 27:38 So what the word. Oh,= so you will giving us what you guys didn't have and I'll, I'll, I'l= l go back to that. Um, we didn't get things that we saw advertised on TV and then some of the, the other kids in town, mainly the, uh, oh, well, I don't know who, which kids, but they got, they got things. So our goal was to provide everything we didn't get as a kid to our children. And that's what we did. I mean, you and Jacob didn't go. You didn't want for anything? No, no. You know, not, not at all. I mean, no, I'd net no, I can't literally can't remember a moment, you know, I mean, I remember being little and like, you know, we didn't have a ton. Right. But we would rent Nintendo.= We would rent an intent though on the weekend. Yeah. And we would, you know, bu= t as soon as [inaudible], you know, we got it.
Speaker 1: = 28:38 Yeah. And I apologize= for that too because I think a lot of the problem with, um, some nowadays we took motivation away. = I mean, when I was a kid we had to work, you know, you guys didn't have to wor= k. No. But why do you think that I've always worked though. Yeah. You have. Wha= t do you think that, I know mom, I think, I think it's for mom. Mom has a, just a workers ethic and I think I'm n= uts. Probably it. Yeah. Yeah. No, but I do, I do definitely see and have seen wit= h a lot of a lot of kids and guys that uh, you know, yeah. They don't have to. <= span class=3DGramE>So they don't, yeah. But that's an issue. So your job was to give us more than you guys had. What do you think grandpa's generation, what was their like? Well, see, their folks grew, were hot and heavy in the depression.
Speaker 1: = 29:33 Yeah. So when they were kids, when my folks were kids, they were probably so frugal. I mean, th= ey saved everything. They didn't splurge on anything and they carried that into their lives. Right. So because it was so, so true= to them where then my folks, you know, they, they got by, but we saw, and I don= 't know why, you know, I had the need and so many in my generation to give you everything. We didn't get why my folks didn't think that way, but I actually think that it's because they had to live through the depression and their fo= lks did at least. Yeah. Yeah. So just, I don't know, I guess for people's background, where did you just keep people where you like, where you were bo= rn and where you grew up? Just like, oh, quick bio. Okay. I was born in Oakland= , California. My Dad was in the navy, LMU to naval air station, so we were the= re about a year and then a, your grandpa went to school at uh, St cloud state a= nd he wound up getting a bachelor's degree in biology.
Speaker 1: = 30:47 From there, he was a = wildlife biologist and he started in Salt Lake City, Utah. We were there all year. So I went to first grade there and then we moved to outside of Washington DC wh= ere he was at Patuxent Wildlife Research Center for my second grade year. And th= en third grade, we were in Jamestown, North Dakota. He worked at the wetlands office and then northern Prairie Wildlife Research Center opened up a few ye= ars later and he transferred out there and he worked as a research biologist for his, his career. So when I graduated high school = from there, uh, one jail, Jamestown, Jamestown, yeah. Yep. Uh, went to college at= , well, I went to college for a year at SDSU, um, then worked for a year and t= hen went in the navy. And that was a good decision because I had no clue what I wanted to do. And I got out, I finished school, got married. I'm now 64 year= s old and still don't know what I want to do when I grow up. So I always notice a quick and I go, what did I do?
Speaker 1: = 31:56 You go to up already.= Um, okay. So a couple of questions came up there. So, um, yeah, I think that, I don't know, I think a lot of my perspective certainly comes fr= om being from North Dakota. But you've always felt that that was home for the m= ost part, right? Yeah. Specifically North Dakota. Rig= ht, right. Yep. Third grade through, you know, my folks moved, I suppose I was i= n the navy and, well I got married and then I think they left then. So, but Jamestown was my home. And you were born there? Yeah. Yeah. There's a pictur= e of you under the, the world's largest buffalo I think. And yeah, but you didn't, but it wasn't a steady, you didn't stay there. Right. I mean, I'm curious that there was a chunk of time before and after I was born. Right. Where you guys, I mean, you were just all over the place, right?<= /span>
Speaker 1: = 32:50 Didn't we live in lik= e 14 towns or something? And we got, we got married in 1980 that first calendar year, that first 12 months we moved seven times. We started in Hewitt, Minnesota, went to Jamestown, um, than to valley city than to Langdo= n to Lamore to Fargo. I started graduate school all in a year. Yeah. And then bac= k to I think Lamar and then to Jamestown. You guys on Meth or something? Yeah, no. All the like that's a lot. What was going on? Well, every move was a, a = pay raise. Oh really? And like the first job in Jamestown, I was how I was selli= ng wood burning stoves on the prairie of North Dakota. And if you can, you know= , the, what's the state tree there? It's a telephone pole. So, so that was an = oh, a analysts job. So the= y actually went out of business within a couple months. I enjoyed it. It was a fun job. And then it just went on from there.
Speaker 1: = 33:59 Um, but we were young= , you know, and strong and, yeah. Yeah. Moms are, your mom's folks were willing to help us move, so we'd load up there, pick up all of our staff felt fit in a pickup truck that= , that old Greg truck of Grandpa's. Yeah. Whoa. Is that still around? I don't think it is anymore. Oh, we should've kept that man. Yeah. Um, were those go= od years? Oh, absolutely. Early years. Yep. Yeah, absolutely. We're happy. Yep. Yeah. No, the best thing I ever did was marry your mom. Yeah. And the second best thing I've ever done was attend that weeken= d, nor the first few years of marriage, um, was great. I mean, I opened up, I l= et her in and then, I don't know, I can't tell you what happened. Yeah. You kno= w, I got hurt. She hurt me somehow. So I started put= ting bricks up. Yeah. And then eventually, like I said, that finally it got to th= e point.
Speaker 1: = 35:05 Never again. Yeah. So= , so then Jake was born when I was three and a half. And then right then you started your big career= . Yeah. Same year. 86. Yep. Right after he was born. He was born 85. Yeah. Yea= h. Fall 85 I started in March of 96. Yep. And a little town called Drayton, Nor= th Dakota. And it's where we grew up. Yeah. Well for a wine years. Yeah. That w= as great for, for us. You know, we had little one horse town, but it had a golf course. Yep. Um, you guys grew up in the golf course= . I bought this old Harley Davidson three-wheel golf cart. Yeah. We'd Strap Jaco= b in his car seat and, and you on in between mom and I and what's your putter? And we'd go golfing. Yeah. There wouldn't be anybody else here. So it was kind of a paradise to grow up in. And a lot o= f ways, you know, I mean it was boring in some ways, but yeah, golfing and you know what I do think a lot about too is, um, well we grew up when grew up go= ing to Lutheran church there and, and you really involved like that was like, th= at was a huge, like the community that we had was so full and real.<= /span>
Speaker 1: = 36:21 Right. Am I remembering that right? No, the, the feeling we got there, they needed that community, needed everybody to participate. So your mom and = I dove in. I mean she became an EMT yeah. To volunteer on the, yeah. Safety, h= er, the rescue squad. You know, I was a uh, parked bo= ard member. I was president of the, um, church. Yeah. And the, wow. They had thr= ee churches and I was president there for awhile. So= we were, you know, super active and it was great. But after those nine years, w= e moved to Fargo for a couple of years and then to Crookston, we stopped. I kn= ow. Totally. I know. And I know, yeah, it was, it was different. It was that conscious. Did you choose that or did it just happen and then it happened? Well, with your mom and I, um, things have to be easy and we had to be wante= d.
Speaker 1: = 37:25 Mm. And apparently they weren't easy and we didn't feel wanted. Yeah. You know, and Fargo or Crookston. So we just, we were busy and yeah. So that's, that's what happened. Yeah. It's a, I, it's actually, it's good for = me to kind of recap and think about that because I know how busy you guys, you guys are busy, you know? And I think especially for mom, she's really busy. Yeah. And that Kinda raising two kids and working, but yes. But even now the= y increase like too busy, I would say. Yeah. In some ways, you know, but in Drayton, did you feel that busy? No. Right? No, he's not at all. It was a wh= ole different feeling. That was our life. And we curled, we learned how to curse= . Yeah. Oh man, you were good at it. Yeah. That was fun. Yeah. We just loved i= t. Yeah.
Speaker 1: = 38:18 Yeah. That's interest= ing. Yeah. Then life had come. Yeah. But well, I mean just to like make connections though. The, the, the community there it was, it was, it was people who are connected, you kno= w, I don't know if you know, how much openness it vulnerable. I don't know if i= t was even ness, but it was real. I mean, I can, I feel it from my childhood a= nd I know how important that was, you know? And then we'd go to, you know, a little more and have all the cousins like there, like we were surrounded by people who loved us. Yeah. Wonder where that, yeah. You know, and then, yeah= , you're right. We moved and then things got a little isolated. Yeah. For sure= . Yeah. We just didn't feel accepted and so it was so easy just to stay in our shell and yeah. You don't do these other things. So yeah, just kind of, you know, actually Crookston was kind of Clicky, you know? And it's similar in a lot of towns. Yeah. I mean if you, if you're an outsider and coming in, you know, there's always a certain faction, it is just Kinda, you know, we'd rat= her you not be here. Sure. It's Kinda like a military town. You know, when I was= in the navy, a station in Jacksonville for awhile,
Speaker 1: = 39:32 we were referred to a= s basis. I mean, they didn't want us there. A lot of people did, but the vocal ones were the ones that didn't. So yeah. I don't know if I have the perspective to really say this, but I feel like today, yeah. I feel like you have to consciously go ou= t and get it. The connection in the community. Mm. Yeah. You got I, and I thin= k that's just, Oh, I agree. 100% yeah. You know, we weren't doing it the right way. It's a little awkward to have to do that, I think. But I think it's a, = it's like an effort. It does. It takes effort. It takes the willingness to put yourself out there. It's take, it's a risk. Right. It is risky. I wasn't willing to risk anything. Right. Yeah. Um, I'm going to jump topics here for= a second. And so you talked about, you know, you fe= eling more comfortable with your dad now.
Speaker 1: = 40:27 Yep. And it is, I mea= n, as you say that too, like Grandpa migrant, your dad and I have had, uh, we've had a nice, good, w= e have a cool relationship. Like we get along well, like we have good talks an= d it's not that we're, you know, the world's closest individuals, but I feel l= ike I get him, I feel like I get your dad and I felt that for a long time. And, = um, and I think there's something, I dunno, there's something really unique abou= t being a Grandpa, which I obviously don't know yet, but when you came, when y= ou guys came here two days ago and you walked in the door, Duke like shit himse= lf, like, just, just like freaked out. Like I've never seen like that. How does that feel? That's gotta be, I mean, well, and also the time your relationshi= p with your grandpa was really special.
Speaker 1: = 41:21 He asked what I was g= onna tell you. They were, the, my grandpas were the most important people in my lives. I didn't have mentors, like you've shared with, with people. Um, they long distant relationships, but, and I got to be around my one grandpa over till I was ab= out over 30 years old, probably mid thirties before he passed away. And then my other Grandpa, um, I think I was nine when he died, but both of them were, a= nd the biggest thing, and as soon as being selfish, but they did not judge me. Yeah. They accepted me. I felt loved and I didn't feel that from my dad. Yea= h. So in any of those points, so they were, they were powe= rful. And one thing I've always been upset about with my father, your grandpa is t= he way he's the GRANDPA. [inaudible] yeah. That, you know, and it just killed m= e to see he wasn't taking advantage of of that. Yeah. And not just with you an= d Jacob, but all his other grandchildren. Yeah. You know, and I, I told myself that, you know, you know, that's, that's what I'm living for. Yeah. You know your mom too. I mean, pretty special. Yeah. You know? Well, mom's crazy abou= t it. She collected children's books for my, for our kids for the last 20 year= s.
Speaker 1: = 43:08 Um, you know, to be h= onest, that's probably one thing that's kept our relationship, kept it together. You know, before I finally went to the retreat. Yeah. It was just a yeah. And then, but common goal, right? Yeah, definitely. And I, oh wait, who's relationship? Yours and= mom's are using mind. Oh Wow. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. My mom o= r yeah. Penniann yeah. Yeah, there was, it definitely did for me once Duke was born and I saw the grandpa and I mean, it is insane for all you listening, l= ike the connect, like your connection with Duke is just, it's insane. Yeah. Like= he wants nothing but you like you are the center of his universe, like all the way. Um, but what I recognized is that when he was born and you know, we wan= t you guys here as with him as much as possible, but, but with that, I think t= he extra tension, I felt even more, I guess bristly around you.
Speaker 1: = 44:22 And once Duke was her= e. Um, I bet. And I wanted you to be here more. So it was this dual tension, so it was, it was tricky. So yeah, I that like, you know, you said earlier wanting other fathers and sons to be able to experience this and it doesn't have to be as intense. It doesn't have to be as a thing, but, but I, but I can just feel, and this is, you know, sure. And maybe not the same for everybody, but to key to key to key give room to make room for you and Duke = to have that connection. Like we could have just been uncomfortable and maybe s= hit would've gone more south over time or we needed to break through it. I'm gla= d we don't have to experience that. Yeah, me too. But it is, it's a, I dunno, = I dunno what is, well, how would you even define it?
Speaker 1: = 45:13 Like what, what is th= e it like what did we do? What did you and I do? What's changed for you between you and I? Why would y= ou even say it? Well, I've dropped that, that barrier, you know, even with you,= I had that, that wall up. Yeah. And just the feeling, the vibe coming from you= , you know, hurt me so much. But I knew I was the cause and I did not know wha= t to do and I would have never done anything. Yeah. And now, no, I didn't know that. I'm sorry for that. That my vibe was hurting I guess. I guess I knew that, but I didn't really know that. Oh yeah. I was easily, you know, like I= do have a lot of feelings and yeah, they were close to the surface, but nobody ever saw them unless I wanted them to see him. It's true. You do have feelin= gs, but daddy, you only had a couple you showed. I know. Yeah. I wasn't even a feeling. It's just like, yeah, yeah. Well I'm sorry that, well, I'm not listening for an apology. Yeah. At all.
Speaker 1: = 46:23 I'm just glad we're w= here we're at now. Yeah. But that, but that rubber, right. But that again, like refining or defining that, like that wall, I don't even know what that is. Like, what is that? That's the eye is, look what I created. You know, I created that tension com= ing from you. That was something I did and that just made me feel so much worse.= So it was just, you know, stacking on top of each other= , like a loop of Oh, shame and hurts and oh yeah. And with no idea how to fix = it. Yeah. Yeah. And what would you tell people other than going on a weekend? Li= ke what is the, how do you fix that? What is the actual mechanism? Don't be afraid. And I think I mentioned earlier, I was just, I was afraid. I was sca= red of being hurt. And one, one thing I came away from the weekend with was that= I can't be hurt right now. The only way I'm going to get hurt is if I want to feel like I got hurt. Yeah. You know? That's why.
Speaker 3: = 47:41 Okay.
Speaker 1: = 47:43 Well that's, I guess = that's how I yeah. Answer that. Yeah. Just don't, don't worry. I mean, you might get hurt. I mean, you don't know, but you're never getting, I wouldn't get beyond that. Right. Without opening myself up, making myself vulnerable, sharing my feelings.
Speaker 3: = 48:06 Okay.
Speaker 1: = 48:08 And what you guys did= , you just gave an in what was so cool? Nothing was prescribed. I mean, you guys didn't tell me wh= at I had to do this or do that. You didn't tell anybody that. It's just, it jus= t flowed. I mean, you set the stage. So first we felt safe. Hmm. I've now got = 50 friends, 50 men out there that care about me and I care about every one of them. Yeah. Who to thought I'd come away with something like that. And then with that, you know, once that, once I felt safe,
Speaker 1: = 48:49 that allowed me the s= pace to just share. And what that did, it was just, you know, like you said, I opened up. Yeah. But = in our small group that made it easier for the guy sitting next to me. Yeah. To finally open up himself and in some, you know, me, you know, all own had to = do is snap his finger and I just, I just spilled my guts. Some a took till that last day. Sure. You know, it was, but it worked for everybody. I know, you k= now, I was extreme, you know, I'll, I'll say that.
Speaker 3: = 49:31 But you know, if, if every one of those me= n didn't come away with, you know, some life changing experience out of that weekend, I'd be shocked. But back to your question.=
Speaker 3: = 49:47 Yes.
Speaker 1: = 49:48 Don't be afraid. I me= an, just share your, what are you feeling? You know, this is so simple and I didn't never got it. I would have never, you know, you could have to= ld me. Yeah. My wife could have told me. Yeah. It took that setting where I fel= t it takes a safety. It does. It does. That's where I think even the men's groups, yeah. You know, it's not going to be that big impactful weekend. I d= on't think, you know, I haven't been too amended. Certainly Ken. Yeah. Yeah. But I've been on a level, like on the scaled, right. The weekends are a big, big= , big event. Yeah. Um,
Speaker 3: = 50:33 okay.
Speaker 1: = 50:33 But that's, I'm glad.= Yeah. I'm glad you said the safety, cause that's, that's a, maybe not the most part, most important part, but clothes. I actually think, you know, yesterday kind of, I never sa= id this in the Ted talk because I didn't have ted x talk. I didn't have time really. But I think that piece is what we can do and need to do. And if I ha= ve a say about it, we'll do men in our s our generation, our society now is to = be able to create that safety around us. Like that piece. Like make our familie= s that safe, like make our workplaces that safe. Yeah. Or at least a level of that. Right. Because, because then it is, it is just then, then it just take= s a little encouragement. The tiniest encouragement. I mean it's almost like the info, like the, the success and the, the way that we're being received is incredible. And it's almost like a like a, like a box of bricks teetering on the edge of a, you know, sheer cliff. And it's like all it takes is like a t= iny touch, like a hair on the, you know, the hair on the kit that broke, breaks = the camel's back. It's like such a tiny touch. Guys are,
Speaker 3: = 51:54 okay,
Speaker 1: = 51:55 so close to this. It'= s not like far away from us begging for it. Yeah. Yeah. And they don't know it, you know? No, but we will tell him. Yeah. So listen up guys. But reall= y though, I mean this is, I know what's more, I can't think of very few things= more important than really I'm going to die knowing yo= u, like really knowing you. Yeah. You know, and my child knows you already and like my grandchildren and they're like, this is like our family is different now. Yeah. Well I shared with my small group, I was gonna I think I did. I shared it with somebody. Um, if I wouldn't have done that, I had, uh, I woul= d have died. A sad, lonely man.
Speaker 3: = 52:43 Okay.
Speaker 1: = 52:43 Yeah. Not Anymore. We= ll, we'll come up with a way to market you. We're going to market you and the world and I'm still, I'= m still holding out for a [inaudible] the world's most vulnerable man. That'll= be okay. Well, the other thing is we got used this opportunity that my dad's sparkling meat. It's made out of honey and raspberries and rhubarb and it is special. It is really special. So what we need to= come up with a, that could be a dude. Oh Geez. It is you. That can be a sponsor o= f the podcast. We can have a commercial. You'll come on be the world's most vulnerable. There you go. Yup. That's good. Really though. I do think, well just imagine that too. So the weekends aren't jus= t about sadness or just the, it is, there's, there's hard stuff, right? But it= just like the, the, the amount of like good stuff we hold back to like our happiness, our creativity, our full self. It's just, it's ridiculous, man. A= nd so, I don't know. Part of my hope is that whether it's you or you pass it on= to somebody else, I hope that that, uh, unleashes that product onto the world. = The mead, it's really fricking special. Um, okay. Last thing I want to ask you i= s, uh,
Speaker 1: = 54:14 do you have any advic= e for me being a dad or whatever? Hm.
Speaker 1: = 54:20 Good question. Let me= say one thing. Preface it with one thing first. I don't know if I told you this or not, but um, in Joshua tree, we were up in the mountain. They tell you this? [inaudible] no.= So basically with my work statement or like what I c= ame up with, I had a moment on the Joshua true treat where I was really overwhel= med and it just came to me. I'm like, I need my dad. Like at this point in my li= fe, like I'm overwhelmed, not sure where this a retreat, like this business, you know, is this business going to go or have another baby trying to move like overwhelmed? Just like I need my dad, you know? And Owen was there for me an= d Aaron was everybody's there for me. But, um, like a week later you said you were coming? Yeah. Wow. So I got ya. You're here. Yeah. Oh yeah. Is there, do you have any advice? Use me. There's, yeah. You know, I don't know there's any advice, but just don't be afraid.<= /span>
Speaker 3: = 55:19 Huh? Um,
Speaker 1: = 55:25 when I see in you is,= and not just in a Ted Tedx talk or that, that weekend is, oh, just power,
Speaker 3: = 55:36 you know, man,
Speaker 1: = 55:40 passion. Passion is t= he, the biggest word.
Speaker 3: = 55:45 Yeah. Yeah. If,<= /o:p>
Speaker 1: = 55:48 if you think I have a=
Speaker 3: = 55:51 hello
Speaker 1: = 55:54 feelings, I mean, you= 're times Tan. Yeah. I don't know. That'd be a lot of feelings right now. No, seriously. You're doi= ng what needs to be done and you're doing what you need to be doing, so, but I'= m there for you. 100% yeah, whatever it is. Like I get to come and cook. Yeah. It's your a, yeah. Yellowstone. An expedition for= a couple of nights. I think so. Absolutely. Yeah. So if you're thinking about signing up and there's still room, I don't know when t= his podcast, I'll go out. Come for the pizza. Come for the pizza and the meat an= d nothing else. No, as far as you know, advice. I don't know if I really have = money here. You're rocking things out, so, all right, well any last thoughts is that you know who popped into my head? Just know it = was Jim Morrison. Me Too. No, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we will.=
Speaker 1: = 56:53 Alright, so I'll do i= t. You know what I was actually going to say? Huh? Is that we'll put outro music of the doors. Oh, it's bad guests. They are my a that this is my band. I'm glad you brought th= at up. That. That was a real connection for us for a long time. Music, music. O= h, absolutely. Big Time. Yeah, big time. All right, good. Here we go. Good stuf= f. Alright, so whoever owns the rights to this song, please don't sue us. Just send us a note and I'll take it out, but we'll go out on the doors. Thanks D= ad. I love you. I love you too.
Speaker 4: = 57:30 Bunny strain, strain = strain. Jetty page says women, same way streets.
Speaker 1: = 57:51 Thank you for listeni= ng to that. You can check out our website@everyman.co we have our upcoming wilderness expedition in Yellowstone National Park. Please join us if you're inclined. You can follow= us on Facebook and Instagram and he can find me on Twitter. You can find Daniel Dodie on Twitter and Instagram and Facebook. Do it all. Sign up. Tell a frie= nd. Thank you guys. Bye.
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